Wednesday, Feb. 02, 2011

Going dancing with dad

Annual Triangle Father-Daughter Dance is Saturday at Marbles

Although it may change in the future, for at least one night, it will be cool to have Dad as a date.

That's the premise behind the Triangle Father-Daughter Dance, held each year around Valentine's Day for girls to have a fun night out and create special memories with dear old Dad.

This year's event will be held from 6 to 9 p.m. Saturday at the Marbles Kids' Museum in downtown Raleigh.

Joel Wiggins came up with the idea for the dance after attending other events in the area with his own daughters.

"These events would always sell out, or there was no diversity," he said. "It became my dream to see a communitywide event."

It has certainly become that - last year's dance attracted nearly 1,000 attendees.

"The event is very diverse. We've got daughters as young as 2 on up to 50 years old attending with their fathers. And the fathers may be Muslim, Christian, black, white, rich, poor - it's just men," Wiggins said.

Tickets for a dad and daughter are $40 in advance. Tickets also can be purchased at the door for $10 more per couple.

A professional photographer will be on hand to take photos of the fathers and daughters as they walk the red carpet to the event. A complementary photo is provided to all attendees, and DVDs of the event will be available for purchase.

"The smile that you see on a little girl's face when she steps out of that car with her daddy - you can't tell her she's not a princess," Wiggins said.

Once inside the venue, a DJ will be on hand to spin some family-friendly tunes to get everyone out on the dance floor. There will be drinks and hors d'oeuvres, and Miss Teen North Carolina will be on hand to take photos with the girls in attendance.

Some families go all out for the event, attending a special dinner beforehand and renting limos for their big arrival.

For Todd Lesley of Raleigh and his daughter Sarah-Gray, the Father-Daughter Dance has become a tradition they look forward to every year. Lesley dons a tuxedo that he purchased back in 1991, and his daughter purchases a new dress.

"We always do dinner beforehand and then make every effort to get there when the doors open because we love to dance," Lesley said. "My favorite part is that for a couple of hours my teenage daughter is not embarrassed to be seen dancing with her dad. I hope to be 70 and attending with my 35-year-old daughter, if she will let me."

Wiggins recognizes that many young ladies in the area are without a father figure in their lives - they may be in the military, in prison, deceased or just not active. While in past years Wiggins and his wife provided for these girls out of their own pocket, this year they are accepting sponsorships to make the night one the girls will remember. New outfits are purchased and plenty of pampering happens before the girls attend the dance as honored guests.

"It was a truly special community outreach program for daughters who were not as fortunate as my daughter," Lesley said. "I remember discovering that and being so happy that we were part of such a special event."

The dance is sponsored by Men Standing in the Gap, a movement started by Wiggins in the hopes of reconnecting men with their communities and encouraging them to become more involved with their families and those in need around them.

"There are organizations struggling to get men involved all across the country," Wiggins said. "I thought, 'Let's be part of the solution and plug in those holes in our communities.'"

Wiggins wants no recognition for what he's done in the community, only calling himself a "spokesman," and he hesitates to put any labels on the group for fear of turning off potential participants.

"We want to be a movement, whether you feel inspired to come out to one event or just get involved at home with your own child," he said. "It's the memories that matter. When your children are grown, they won't remember all the things you bought for them. They'll remember the time you took to spend with them."

Wiggins began taking his own daughters, who are now 7 and 9 years old, to father-daughter dances several years ago. He has photos from past dances displayed in his office and at home. In one, he's dancing with both girls in his arms.

"Both of their heads are on my shoulder, and they're in the safest place they could ever be - in their father's arms," he said. "And I'm in the greatest place I could ever be - with my little girls."